Parents really do have a favourite child, new study suggests. And it’s probably who you think it is


This may not seem news if you have brothers and a long -standing feeling that one of you could steal a bank and still be the golden child.

But a new study suggests that parents really have a favorite child based on the order of birth, gender and personality. Although the reasons can be more complex.

The younger brothers generally receive a slightly more favorable treatment of their parents, according to a meta -analysis of almost 19,500 people in 30 different studies published in the USA., Canada and Western Europe between 2015 and 2022, plus another 14 unpublished databases.

However, this favoritism for the family baby was no longer true when the authors specifically looked control and autonomy as predictors, and then, parents preferred the elderly. In other words, parents were less controllers of older brothers.

Parents also reported a little favoring daughters about their sons. But the personality also played a role, since the authors pointed out that parents tended to favor children who were “pleasant” and “conscientious”, regardless of birth and gender.

“Our findings specifically suggest that within families, some children can be easier as a father than others,” the authors wrote in the study, which was published in the Psychological Bulletin of the American Association of Psychology earlier this month.

Parents tend to prefer children who are more conscious and pleasant, according to new research. (Shuttersock)

Brigham Young (byu) researchers in Provo, Utah and Western University in London, Ontario, analyzed the birthday, gender, temperament and personality and if they predict parental differential treatment. The authors analyzed responses from parents and siblings.

The study has been in the headlines worldwide. But Lisa Strohschein, a professor of Sociology at the University of Alberta and the editor in chief of Canadian Studies in Population, suggests that this may be due to the fact that the story simply fits the narratives that people already have about the preferential treatment of The parents.

The study itself had very small effect sizes, warned, to the point that they are almost “trivial.” Even the authors recognize their small sizes of effect in their limitations, added Strohschein, where they write that “the reasons why parents deal with different ways are more complex and extend beyond the factors explored in this study.”

“If parents prefer one child on another, that can have really toxic effects,” News Strohschein told CBC, who did not participate in the new study.

“It is very common, but I don’t think it depends on age, gender or birthday as much as we think.”

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Favoritism is common

The prodigal son. The golden child. The rebel. As much as parents can deny it, the belief that parents prefer a brother on another is rooted throughout our culture.

For a good reason. A research strip suggests that parents’ favoritism is quite common, which occurs in up to 65 percent of American families. In studies, it is called “parental differential treatment” or PDT to abbreviate. It has been informed in other countries, such as China and Mexico, and has been associated with the psychosocial well -being of children.

“Children who perceive a greater PDT than other children may feel competition or injustice among the brothers, with favored and disadvantaged children who show poorest mental health,” said the authors of a 2020 study in Hong Kong.

And other studies examining PDT predicors, such as the order of birth and gender, have shown similar results. For example, a 2003 study suggested that parents often favor the youngest child. A 2006 study said mothers often favor daughters to their sons.

“Most parents probably connect more easily with one child on another, either due to personality, birthday, gender or other things such as shared interests,” said the teacher of the family life of Byu, Alex Jensen, in a press release.

“Be aware of those patterns within you. Pay attention to how your children react to things that could be perceived as favoritism.”

But Strohschein emphasizes that the raising of children is not fixed; It is dynamic, changes over time as children age and parents have more experience. Then she says that asking flat questions in studies like these, such as “their parents favored girls about boys,” does not necessarily reflect the reality of who parents are and how do they treat their children?

“You are learning as you go,” said Strohschein.

Three children in colorful jackets walk with an adult on a wooded path. Photo taken from behind.
A recent study of 700,000 online participants from Canada, the United States, Australia and the United Kingdom discovered that children in the middle were more cooperative than their brothers, but could be due to family size instead of the birthday. (Getty images)

Good news for children in the middle?

But as for the finding of the current study that parents tended to favor the most pleasant and conscientious child? That can be good news for children in the middle, according to a new research led by Canadian published at the end of December in the magazine Acts of the National Academy of Sciences

This study of more than 700,000 participants online in Canada, the United States, Australia and the United Kingdom found that children in the middle were more cooperative.

That is in contrast to most previous research, which discovered that adult personality features were not related to their birthday, said Michael Ashton, a professor of psychology at the University of Brock and main author of the study Canadian, to CBC News. But his research found that the media obtained more than two personality dimensions involved in the cooperative, specifically, honesty/humility and kindness.

That said, he pointed out that the findings can be more related to the size of the family than the birthday, since children in the middle tend to be larger families. And on average, larger families tend to be higher in these cooperative features.

“We suspect that when one grows around the brothers, even during the first years of one, there is a greater need to cooperate, which leads one to develop a slightly more cooperative personality,” said Ashton.

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