Meredith Gaudreau, the widow of the NHL star Johnny Gaudreau, has written a heartbreaking essay for the player’s tribute that details the devastating moment he knew that her husband died.
Johnny Gaudreau 31, who played for the Columbus Blue Jackets, and his younger brother, Matthew Gaudreau, 29, died in August 2024 after an alleged drunk driver crashed into them while riding bicycles in their hometown of New Jersey.
In his essay, which was written in the style of an open letter to his late husband, Meredith Gaudreau revealed that the death of the brothers on August 29, 2024 arrived a week after she told her husband that she was secretly pregnant with her third son, Carter, now 2 months.
“In my head I couldn’t believe we were about to have three children under 3 years. It seemed to handle us a lot. He was afraid,” he wrote. “But your face, John. Your face at that time told me everything I needed to know: that it would be fine. We were going to be the best small team in history.”
The day of the death of her husband, who was also the four anniversary of the day the couple committed, began with a high note. Meredith Gaudreau recalled that the professional hockey star prepared breakfast for her two older children, daughter Noa, now 2 years old, and her son Johnny, now 1, while sleeping.
“I entered the kitchen and said: ‘Hello, today is the day. August 29. Four years ago.’ Four years since the day you took a knee and asked one more question,” he wrote.
“It was going to be a great day,” he added, noting that the couple would attend the wedding of their sister -in -law Katie Gaudreau on August 30.
“You were going to play golf with Matthew and all wedding sponsors. You had our packaged car to the edge of the perfect way of Tetris. Things for the wedding, things for Columbus, things for Johnny’s christening.
“You said goodbye to everyone and you told us you would see us later. And that was,” he wrote.
Hours later, the idyllic morning became a nightmare.
“Katie called, and she said something had happened, but she didn’t know what exactly,” wrote Meredith Gaudreau.
“My dad took me to those of your parents, and I thought about how I was going to help you through what could be what had happened to Matty,” he wrote about his brother -in -law, whose wife, Madeline Gaudreau, was also pregnant at that time.
“And then I walked along the front porch and I knew that the worst had happened and that they were both,” he wrote.
“There are no words to go here,” he added.
He recalled that his initial response after listening to the news was a “shock” that was “indescribable.” Then, he was “caled” and sick of the stomach “for days, he wrote.
“The only person who can interact with me is my own sister -in -law. I see her and my heart breaks for her. I am sick with her,” he wrote.
“I thought about our baby inside me. I couldn’t get up. I was awake and having nightmares. Thinking about you at that time. Thinking about Matty. It’s the worst thing I could have imagined,” he wrote. “And in an instant, I missed you more than I knew it was possible. And I haven’t stopped missing you since then.”
“Going to prepare for a beautiful wedding all week with her sister, to being at a funeral home with Madeline trying to solve all these things, it simply hurt a lot,” he wrote.
Near the end of his letter, Meredith Gaudreau expressed his appreciation for his family and the sports community for all the love and support they gave to her already Madeline Gaudreau during the worst days of their lives.
He also told his late husband how much he admired him as a man, companion and father. “You were perfect,“She wrote. “I don’t know how you could have been better. “
He added that he felt “fortunate” that his three children, including the baby Carter, the son that his late husband never had the opportunity to meet, inherited his best qualities.
Meredith Gaudreau concluded his emotional rehearsal by desiking his late husband for a “happy first day of the father as the father of three children!”
“Thank you for the best years of my life,” he wrote. “Thank you for making us a family. Thank you for being my best friend, my favorite person, the man of my dreams.”
